Most women shouldn’t think about another woman sitting on her partner, but 40-year-old Summer has no problem with this. In fact, she and her boyfriend exchange partners.
“I don’t get jealous at all when another woman is on him. I just love to see that he is enjoying it so much. ”
Some years ago, my boyfriend and I got the idea to swing. We were initially a couple seeking woman for a threesome, but this turned out to be more difficult than we thought.
We didn’t want to ask anyone from our circle of friends. And it was difficult to get in touch with a woman on the internet because we just didn’t know where to look.
The Swingers Dating Club
Out of sheer curiosity, my boyfriend and I decided to go to a swingers club. We thought it would be easier for us to get in touch with a woman there, but going into such a club was terrifying.
I didn’t know what to expect and first thought that there would be a lot of dirty old men or couples in leather suits.
Fortunately, this turned out not to be the case at all. It was like entering a cosy bar and we only met friendly people.
In the club, we only saw couples, not women who were alone. We, therefore, decided to expand our search area: we also wanted to get in touch with couples.
Finding the right pair proved to be difficult. After all, we both had to like the man and the woman. Via the internet, we eventually got to know the first couple we had a date with.
For The First Time
The first time I was really scared. I had no idea what to expect and got nervous with the idea that I might have sex with a woman, I had no experience at all.
Unfortunately, our first time at swingers dating was not a success. The couple with whom we made arrangements turned out not to be together at all, but was an occasional couple.
We thought that was a pity, we wanted to ‘date’ a couple who had a good relationship, we had discussed our boundaries beforehand and decided to go for ‘Soft Swap’, which means that you only kiss with the other person and satisfy them orally.
Fortunately, after that meeting, we also came into contact with couples who are together. In the past few years that we have been doing this, we have ‘dated’ over thirty couples.
I always call it dating because I think ‘swinging’ sounds so negative. Moreover, we do not sleep with every couple, for some, it remains only friendly.
Getting To Know The Couple First
When we meet a couple in real life, we don’t immediately dive into bed with them. We always speak to them in advance by phone or video chat so that we know who we have in front of us.
When we meet with them, we often go somewhere to eat or have a drink. Sometimes we also meet with them at our home, but then we have been in contact for weeks, sometimes even months.
We don’t always have chemistry with every couple and yes, that can be quite uncomfortable. For example, we once met with a couple who were interested in us. But we did not feel the same.
We only agreed that they would stay the night, so breakfast was a bit uncomfortable.
When we eventually go on our favourite threesome finder site and find a couple seeking woman or a couple seeking couples and the ‘exchange’ takes place, my boyfriend and I are always together.
Then we don’t go to another room. At first, it was weird to see my boyfriend kissing another woman and moving on with her just sitting right next to me, but I have never been jealous.
I can enjoy it intensely to see him enjoy it, but I have to find the lady in question pretty. So I really enjoy going a step further with the lady, so we are looking for couples whose wife is open to that.
Boundaries And Rules
My boyfriend and I have agreements about ‘sex dating’. We do not engage in rough sex like S & M and we are not open to sex between two men.
The intention is that the three or four of you have fun, but when I kiss or continue with the other woman, the men watch. They just enjoy seeing that.
In the beginning, we were a bit stricter in our rules. We held on to Soft Swap for a long time, only when we really clicked with another couple and it felt good did we go for the Full Swap where you completely switch partners.
We now have more experience and we know more quickly whether we like a lady and gentleman enough for the Full Swap.
My boyfriend and I then just have to look at each other to see what the other person thinks.
It is important to us that the couple we are sex dating are lovely people, we don’t like dominant couples that dive right on top of you.
We want to date people who build it up quietly and we think it is important that they have a good relationship themselves.
It sometimes happens that we meet people who post couple seeking woman or couple seeking couples ads in an attempt to save their relationship, but it doesn’t work.
Then it is going to cause cracks in your relationship. In addition, we think it is important that we have a click with the other couple.
We have dated a couple with whom we did not have a physical click, but with whom we have become friends. For us, swinging is not just about sex, but about a beautiful friendship, possibly with extras.
The swing between me and my boyfriend has only gotten better! It has brought us closer together. That we do this is really our secret.
We enjoy it together and we enjoy it because the other person enjoys. Our sex life, especially my anal orgasm’s has also become much better as a result.
This allows us to indicate even better what we like and what we don’t. You also sometimes do something with someone you never thought of yourself. This inspires you to do something like that with your own boyfriend.
I’m not afraid that my boyfriend will fall in love with someone else.
I know that we live in a time when people cheat or do fall in love with other people, which can happen anywhere, at any time.
My boyfriend and I trust each other completely so we can do this. As long as this feels good for both of us, we will keep swinging too. But when we are in bed together in the evening, we are very happy with each other.
We always come to the conclusion that we still have the best together.
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